In my free online class, Coparenting Sanity: your blueprint for surviving life with a manipulative, controlling or hostile coparent, (accessible at www.divorcecoach.com.au/freeclass) I talk about a process that I call “sorting the laundry”
I explain that “the whites” are strictly coparenting business, which is all about the children, non emotional, non personal, practical, logical, helpful, cooperative and respectful.
“The colours” are the emotional experience, the ‘triggers’, or things that upset you, the history and the power struggles.
I explain that the content of these two baskets needs to be kept separately.
I also point out that there are “the delicates”, which are the very sensitive issues, the place where you feel you are falling apart and your deep emotional pain. I speak about the importance of taking special care with the contents of this basket.
When it comes to “sorting” your own “laundry”, you may wonder how this really happens, and what that would look like for you.
Well, I have recorded a podcast with a client, Janice, in which I help her to sort her laundry. If you listen to it, you may find it easier to know how to sort your laundry.
On the podcast page you can find a link to downloadable worksheet, to help you take what you have learned and apply it to your situation.
If you would like the opportunity to receive this kind of coaching from me, you can apply to be on my podcast, by emailing me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Or you may what to hire me to do some private coaching with you.